Matthew 18:12 — If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others on the hills and go out to search for the one that is lost?
Ben Fuller is standing in a church aisle in Nashville. From the outside, he looks fine. But inside, he’s still that little kid from Virginia waiting to hear his father say, I’m proud of you.
He always claimed he didn’t need help. But that wasn’t true. He was just learning how to numb the pain.
A knee injury opened the door to pain pills. Pills became escape. Escape turned into addiction.
Ben learned to hide it well—just enough work, charm, and money to keep things afloat. He convinced himself—and everyone else—that he was fine.
But eventually, “fine” fell apart.
Bills slipped. Relationships crumbled. Rehab didn’t stick. Not even losing his best friend to fentanyl stopped the spiral. By the time he moved to Nashville in 2018 to chase music, the deeper battle wasn’t just addiction.
It was the belief that he was too far gone.
Then God showed up.
At a dinner table.
A family from Vermont, already living in Nashville, invited Ben over. No agenda. Just food and kindness. They invited him to church, and he said yes—mostly out of courtesy. Raised on a dairy farm, he figured when someone does something kind, you return it.
That’s how he ended up in that church aisle.
By Easter Sunday, he was exhausted. Tired of drinking. Tired of broken relationships. Tired of pretending he could fix himself.
At the altar, he stopped running.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
What met him there wasn’t condemnation.
It was relief.
Jesus once told a story:
“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away… won’t he leave the ninety-nine… and go out to search for the one that is lost?” — Matthew 18:12
Ben realized something life-changing that day: he had never been invisible. His wandering had been noticed. The Shepherd hadn’t given up on him. God didn’t wait for him to clean himself up or find his way back.
God came after him.
His song “Black Sheep” was born from that rescue—a reminder for anyone who feels out of place or beyond saving. Now, five years sober, Ben sings it in prisons and broken places as living proof that there is no saint without a past and no sinner without a future.
Because God doesn’t run away from runaways.
The Shepherd still searches. Still calls names. Still leaves the ninety-nine for the one.
And maybe today, that one is you.
A MOMENT TO REFLECT
- Have you ever believed you were too far gone for God to reach? What fueled that belief?
- How does Matthew 18:12 change the way you see God’s pursuit of you?
- Who in your life might feel like the “one” right now—and how can you reflect the Shepherd’s heart toward them?
- What would it look like for you to stop running and receive God’s grace today?
Lyrics:
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
You broke through a thousand fences
Been rescued from a thousand ditches
You still swear you don’t fit in
So you kick and scream and you’re gone again
Wandering off into the devil’s wind
But how’s it going out there
Acting like you ain’t scared
How’s that heart of stone
Ain’t so hard when you’re alone
Crying tears you hope nobody sees
Guess the Good News is He’ll never leave you be
Jesus loves you black sheep
You hate everything about you
You think we’re better off without you
You wear your pain out on your sleeve
And you paint it on in rebel ink
But the alcohol and pills ain’t fixed a thing
How’s it going out there
Acting like you ain’t scared
How’s that heart of stone
It ain’t so hard when you’re alone
Crying tears you hope nobody sees
Guess the Good News is He’ll never leave you be
Jesus loves you black sheep
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Jesus loves you black sheep
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Can’t tell you when, I ain’t no prophet
But there’ll come a point in time when you can’t stop it
The Good Shepherd’s love smells like smoke
There ain’t no hell so low
Where He won’t let the hounds of Heaven go
Sic ‘em, let the hounds of Heaven go
So how’s it going out there
Acting like you ain’t scared
How’s that heart of stone
Ain’t so hard when you’re alone
Crying tears you hope nobody sees
Guess the Good News is He’ll never leave you be
And amazing grace is a pesky pesky thing
But the Good News is He’ll never leave you be
Jesus loves you black sheep
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Jesus loves you black sheep
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Oooooh
Writers: Ben Fuller, Tony Wood, and Michael Farren